A Year Off Social Media -- What It's REALLY Like
So, it’s officially been a year since I’ve been off social media. (You can read more about that here , here, and here).
I never intended to be off social media for this long. It was only “supposed to be” a break. Maybe a week or two, or a month…
But as time went on, things really shifted.
At first, there were some big positives like having way more time on my hands, feeling emotionally better and like I’m enough. There were big improvements in my sleep, my marriage, my friendships, and my anxiety levels.
As always, I gotta be honest.
There were some negatives creeping in like feeling a little left out of the loop and missing some friends that weren’t in my immediate social circle. I also felt some embarrassment on how much I was trained to reach for my phone, the boredom was getting real my friend. And a tough one was that I was afraid my businesses were going to fail. (Heads up! Spoiler alert! — all of these turned into positives)
Even with the negatives, there was so much overwhelming goodness that came from being off of these platforms that it just kept me away.
The biggest, by far, benefits of being off social media are these:
1. My health has improved
I’m talking emotional, mental, spiritual, physical — all of it. I can’t tell you if it was the improvements in sleep, a decrease in anxiety, or having more time to slow down and decrease the input of stuff into my brain. To be honest, it’s probably all of those things combined. Without scrolling on Instagram I didn’t have to compare my body, my marriage, my work, my weekends, my life — check for mental health. I didn’t have the constant chatter in my eyes or my Facebook feed of what everyone else was up to (including that girl from high school I haven’t spoken to in over 10 years?), or emotionally handle the over influx of news, real, fake, and everything in between — check for emotional health. Being able to slow down, yes things really can wait, and stay present to who and what is in front of me while getting better sleep and more down time — check for spiritual and physical health. I’ve learned this: Offline really where I live my best life.
2. My business actually thrived
Yep. I said it. I became incorporated, booked a TEDx talk (COVID rescheduled to April 2021!), and got the absolute pleasure of working with incredible clients and patients. I hit big income goals, stayed completely debt-free in my business and personal life, invested into retirement, and have a solid emergency fund in my biz and my personal accounts. I was able to donate to causes, partner with awesome folks, and when I said incredible clients and patients, I meant it. All the time off social media allowed me to pour into the areas of my business that were actually needle movers. The places that have an ROI but more importantly, impact. It’s been a successful year in business for me, but also a fulfilling one. Being able to take time off to travel (Pre-COVID of course), have a safety net to sit comfortably through the storm and help others, and continue working on projects and with people that light me up. All of which, I’ll admit, I was terrified of losing. But in reality, it became more clear, more saturated, and with higher impact and satisfaction. This is definitely something I’ll be continuing on the business front!
3. I am more clear on who I am and what’s important to me
Y’know, social media had the ability to make me feel responsible for, and care about, so many people. And if I can be honest (which you know I am), too many people. Listen, caring burnout and fatigue are real. Especially given this past year with all that’s happened in the world with racial justice, public health, and general goings-on. I was grateful to be off social media which helped to quiet the noise, allow reflection and facts to come forth, and gave me space to actually take action on the things and with the people and causes that are important to me. I know social media can have its place to communicate and further visions and missions, but ultimately, my life exists off social media and that’s where my focus, change, and reflections need to be. Having the volume so high on peripheral causes and folks was draining me to the point where I couldn’t actually listen to or make an impact in the areas and with the people who matter to me. Having that volume turn down to a low hum allowed the melody of who I am, and what and who are important to me, come to the surface. It’s been powerful and so life-giving.
4. I have more to give
This kind of goes along with everything above. Having more space, better health, solid business — gives me a foundation to give to others. Can I attribute all of this to being off social media? Probably not, but I would say a big chunk of it is due to that. Being able to support my local businesses, donating to causes I’m passionate about, and giving my time to others has been so fulfilling. The best places I’ve been able to give have been in those close personal relationships. My husband, my family, my siblings, my nieces, and nephews, and frankly, myself. Y’know, I’ve always had the thought that the world would be a better place if we all had the ability to be surrounded with support, big or small, and to feel the strength within oneself. This past year has been like an experiment in that area and it’s come with challenges to test it. But seeing how it’s shaken out this far, I can tell you that it’s holding pretty accurate for me and my loved ones. It’s come to this: I can give more of myself to others because I have more of myself to give.
5. I feel like I am enough (most of the time)
This is probably the biggest one out of this whole list and this whole journey. Let me be frank: Social media makes me feel like I’m not enough. At the end of the scroll, the post, the likes, the views, I’ve got this beast inside that is just never satisfied. It thrived in the environments of comparison and metrics: which social media is riddled with. Cutting that out was like cutting off the beast, to a degree. Not having a daily, or multiple times a day, habit that regularly made me feel terrible about myself, my body, my life? Sign me up. Exactly what you can imagine happened, happened. The beast still lingered but it was starved. It put up a fight to get fed (I can’t tell you how many times I was close to caving and going back on social media “just to see” LOL), but it didn’t last. Eventually, that beast became more manageable, workable if you will. Finally, I had space to actually make progress on my journey of self-worth. Yes, the free time, but also the mental clarity and lack of negative fuel facilitated that. The tools in my tool belt became more impactful, therapy started working faster, my core beliefs really started the slow, but steady, shift to align with my worth. Now, again, being honest — Do I always feel like enough? Nope. But do I feel that way more than I used to on social media? HECK TO THE YES. This benefit alone has made this whole experience worth it.
Now, officially a year later, I can tell you that I don’t have intentions of going back to socials any time soon.
I may have some “pop-ins” here and there for big news, or checking in, but I don’t see social media being a part of my life any longer in the capacity it once was.
Listen, I know it’s not for everyone. Heck, some businesses are built on in, it’s a main way of communicating with family, it can bring joy and laughter — I get it.
But for me? Life is way more delicious when I’m out living it.
When I’m not tacking on hours of busy work for my businesses that aren’t as impactful for my bottom line. When I’m waking up and enjoying cuddles instead of scrolls. When I fall asleep to peace, rather than a screen. When I get to experience my food, my home, my husband, my family, my travels, my life — and not just capture it or see it through a screen or think about how I can post about it. When I can be myself instead of comparing myself.
I’m so looking forward to what the next year will bring. I’m looking forward to more freedom with my screens and time. More joy and love and presence. I’m not saying I won’t be on screens, because let’s face it — it’s 2020 and screens are a big part of our pandemic life. But I can tell you that social media will play a very, very, insignificant role in it. And that — makes me happy.
I want to leave you with this:
Have you ever taken time off social media? I mean really taken time? A month? 6? A year?
If not, I really recommend it. You might just surprise yourself. I know I did.
If you’ve taken a break, or are thinking about it, let me know below! I’d love to chat with you about it!